Episode 249: What it means to recover from sobriety with Michele Hobin
00:00
When my client Michelle told me she was going to reintroduce alcohol, whether I liked it or not, I’ll be honest, I was nervous. Actually, that’s bullshit. I felt like a failure. She’d been sober for 10 months, and I was her sobriety coach. And at that time, I was still operating on the mindset that once an alcoholic, always an alcoholic, because everybody knows you can’t unpickle a cucumber. But as we learn in coaching school,
00:29
The client is the expert on their own lives. Telling people what they should or shouldn’t do is condescending, not coaching. So I checked my fear and anxiety and held space for her. Michelle is the first client I coached with a truly open mind, where there is no right way to drink, no moral high ground for whoever has the most sober days, and no starting over after you have a drink. Alcohol is neutral.
00:57
It’s not good or bad or right or wrong. It’s not the problem or the solution. Working with Michelle completely changed the way I think about recovery from alcohol use disorder. She is my patient zero, if you will. This experience laid the foundation for the work that I do now as a mindful drinking coach. And she’s here today to share her story and talk about what it was really like to learn how to trust herself again.
01:24
to heal her relationship with herself so she doesn’t have to worry about her relationship with alcohol. This is raw. It’s honest. It’s messy. And for me, it’s personal because she opened my eyes and my heart and my mind to see what’s really possible when you stop using the past to predict the future.
01:50
My name is Colleen and I’m a mindful drinking coach helping high achieving professional women permanently reduce their alcohol consumption by 80%. Join me each week for evidence based holistic strategies to regulate your nervous system, balance your dopamine and activate the growth mindset that makes you so powerful in other areas of your life so you can stop worrying about losing control and trust yourself again. Get happy, not sober, it’s not about the alcohol.
02:25
Michelle, I’m so honored that you are taking the time today to come back and have a conversation with me. I want to introduce you to my audience because you are kind of the origin story of where my approach developed. You and I worked together years ago, but can you just introduce yourself to the audience? Tell them who you are, what you do, maybe how we got together. Hi Colleen, thank you. I started with Colleen’s
02:54
original beta group by four or five years ago now. 2021. I am a safety professional and also a kitchen designer. Those are my big deals that I go back and forth with. I live full time in my RV now in South Carolina. I hit rock bottom at a rock concert where I had an allergic reaction to alcohol at Billy Joel concert.
03:21
Thankfully I did get to see him after that, I ended up in the emergency medical tent and they were worried they’d have to send me to the medical center to have my stomach pumped or fluid. I ended up getting fluids and that was where I hit rock bottom and I ended up finding Colleen’s information on a Facebook ad. And I guess as they say, the rest is history, right? Yeah. So you came into my program when I was
03:49
selling sobriety as we were going to the drinking problem. And so you came in and we got to know each other. You got a lot of coaching and you did get sober for a period of time. Talk to me about what that was like for you taking a break. It was the best worst thing possible. I knew in my mind, my grandmother had a really big problem with alcohol.
04:19
and I didn’t want to go down that road. And I remember our first conversation and it’s still.
04:27
brings back emotions. She ended up basically being almost agoraphobic and just drinking in her house and ultimately heart problems killed her. you know, I’m sure that her liver and the rest of her systems were no go and she was in her 60s, which is way too young for that. But you know, I realized that she had problems or not even problems, just didn’t know how to balance her emotions and
04:57
Um, that was, that was her outlet, her emotional outlet. mean, and I did the same thing. I drank my feelings all, all the time, every time I would have never reached for, um, an alcoholic drink if it wasn’t. And I do now I don’t because, um, it’s a, it’s an emotional tie for me. Yeah.
05:27
Yeah. So when you joined the program, were you thinking that you were getting sober for life? I was never touching another drop ever. Like it was, it was just tied to, to just bad things. And at that point I was, um, my tolerance was so high that I had to drink like to, actually like,
05:58
be above and away from my emotional whatever, I had to drink a ton. And then you get to the point where you go, what did I do last night? Yeah. I never wanted to miss another concert. I never wanted to have my mother look at me like, holy shit. I was at a football stadium, and I almost cracked my head open on the concrete. Someone caught me when I went down.
06:26
I never want that look on anyone’s face. I never want my best friend to go, please, please promise me you’ll go to a meeting. Never, ever wanted to do that to anyone else. It’s fine if, you I wreck my own situation, but when other people weigh in and you see what it’s doing to them.
06:54
you know, ultimate people policing behavior. It’s okay for me, but you know, when, everything else is jumping at everyone else, then okay, I guess I probably should get this fixed. Yeah.
07:07
So then what was it like in the early days of sobriety? How long did you stay completely sober? Ten months.
07:18
The early days well for me. I remember talking in our group sessions. It was like no go it was actually Very easy because I had drawn a line in the sand I knew what it did and And I knew after being that sick. I mean that was the sickest. think I’ve ever been food poisoning anything like you know I’ve had a bunch surgeries
07:46
I was run over by an ATV, but that was the sickest I’ve ever been. And I never wanted to go back there. So for me, I remember listening to people struggling in our group sessions about going backwards and the whole nine yards. I’m like, that’s not me because I just, for whatever reason, must be tied to being sick or tied to the emotional.
08:16
situation, I didn’t want anything. Even the day, I remember the day that I decided I was going to try a gin and tonic. It was my, one of my closest friend’s daughter’s showers. And I remember on the way there, I’m like, am I going to try this out? Am I, am I going to do this experiment? I mean, I’m in a good group of people. Um, it’s social. I just wanted to see if I could have one drink and
08:46
be done. And I’m like, well, today’s the day. I remember because I feel like you called. I think I called you. I think I called you either on the way or yeah, I think it was on the way there. You called me before and after. And that was a real turning point for me because, know, as coaches, we’re supposed to support our clients in like whatever they want. They set the agenda, right? Right. And when I look back, you know, creating a sobriety program, it’s like, well,
09:14
I broke the first rule in the first line. like, well, I’m going to help you get sober. And that’s okay. We did a lot of good work. But I remember when you called me having to set aside my own fear because I was still operating on this belief. You know, I went to AA meetings and I got infected with some true isms that really kept me thinking like it wasn’t going to go well. And one of them was you can’t unpickle your cucumber.
09:44
And I remember listening to some podcast where they talked about like the amount of tolerance you get is like the watermark in your brain. And like once you learn how to drink like that, you can never unlearn. And so those are not true. Like once I started working with you, I later found that, no, no, no, no, no, six months, 12 months within breaking that habit. You know, not only does your tolerance reset, you can reset that in like 30 days, but
10:13
it’s like you you never go backwards. Like you’re always learning what you like and what and so within six to 12 months, like the prefrontal cortex and self regulation is denser after you’ve overcome and broken the habit. But I didn’t know that at the time. I didn’t either. You calling me and setting aside my fear.
10:35
and just really being supportive and curious of like, I don’t know if this is going to go well. Like, do you think? So talk to me about that experience when you did reintroduce alcohol. was, you know, it was the best of all occasions to do it. Um, I’m sure that I wouldn’t have wanted to do it at a family reunion or place where my ex in-laws were some other craziness, but it was the best. mean, I love this girl, like a daughter, you know? Um, and
11:05
A lot of my friends were there. I didn’t have any social anxieties. I think it was like, I want to say it was a, it must have been a few months or maybe a month before I moved. So I was in like a good place. Weight wise, moving wise, I was in a great head space and it was a wonderful occasion. And I pretty much floated under the radar with it. I was like, hey, can I, can I get a...
11:34
and I was off kind of on my own because the mother of the bride was busy doing her own thing and I don’t think there was anyone, like a group of friends there that I was with and at that point I had been sober for 10 months so I didn’t really associate with a lot of my drinking friends at that point. So it was kind of like the best situation.
12:02
ordered it, came in a tall glass and I, without really thinking about it because I didn’t really want to put a whole lot into it, I nursed the thing. I mean, think I had to ask for ice like twice and it wasn’t even like, like in my previous life, it had been like, give me another, give me another, I’m good. Don’t even have a buzz. So I just remember enjoying it.
12:31
I remember saying something years ago in group about drinking being in a full contact sport because all my cousins are guys. My brother, know, whoever, everybody I associated with, I always had guy friends and it was like, we need to drink this person under the table. And it always felt like without realizing it, that it was a full contact sport. This was great. This was like, I’m like, oh, this is how like real functioning
13:00
adult people enjoy alcohol without the stigmas or the baggage, the emotional baggage that goes along with it. Yeah. So you had a positive experience and you enjoyed it. Tell me how that made you feel. Did you feel like all that other stuff was behind you? Did you feel hopeful? Did you feel anxious that it was going to come back? No, no.
13:28
I don’t think I did. And I think even when I talked to you, was like, that was interesting. It’s just, it is.
13:42
It didn’t have any power. It was just a thing that someone distilled somewhere, a couple of ounces of a thing that looks like water, sounds like water. It doesn’t taste like water, but. Got a kick. Yeah, it just, it was this thing in a glass instead of this big deal that I made it into where something was going to save me from.
14:11
you know, thinking or worrying or, you know, subconsciously, of course, but it didn’t have any power. It was just something in a glass that.
14:22
just kind of sat there.
14:26
It only has as much power as you let it have. Or I let it have. What do you think allowed you to experience such a shift in your relationship with alcohol?
14:45
Mmm.
14:47
I think the camaraderie, the coaching for sure. Somebody walking in, and that would be you, somebody walking in, no holds barred, saying, you know what? Screw this shit. And that’s all of it. I mean, I remember telling you that I had three Facebook ads that I used that summer, or that spring, that summer, whatever it was.
15:17
Every single one of them, I felt like came into my life at the right time for a reason. And I stand by that. Most of the time I look at Facebook ads now and I go, what a joke. But it just happened to align in my life at the right time. And I think that I don’t think I would have had any better, any luck at all with a different coach. I mean,
15:45
I respected you because you came in and were like, this is how it is. This is what it worked, how it worked for me. And we’re going to kick his ass. I’m like, that is exactly what I need. Yeah. Well, and I was still very focused on the behavior then, but what I’m hearing from you does speak to, you know, take the good and leave the rest. Right. It sounds like you had an identity shift that allowed you to even
16:16
expand beyond my little container of the behavior of putting that in right and wrong and what you should do and shouldn’t do. But the work that we did with you seeing yourself as somebody who’s capable of change, who wants to change, who is not powerless. And so it sounds like, you know, when you took that drink, it was almost like the beginning of the next phase, where I trust myself.
16:44
to not be perfect, but to learn from my mistakes. Yeah. And that’s a lot. That is it. I remember thinking in the back of my head, I’m like, boy, I’m going to catch a ration of shit from Colleen on this. I can just feel it. But you know what? I’m still going to try it. If I’m wrong, what have I got to lose? I mean, the next day, thankfully, our bodies reset and the world resets and life resets every
17:12
24 hours into a new day and if I made it 10 months without a drink, you know, this is an experiment and we just write our notes and look at all of the information that we gained and we started again the next day. And at the end of the day, I had a really great gin and tonic. mean, it was fantastic. So, but I didn’t, I didn’t feel anything. It was, it was fantastic, but
17:42
Yeah, I had definitely had an identity shift. I wasn’t, it was almost like, if you’ve ever been a people pleaser, when you break away from that, it’s so amazing. Even just a little bit, maybe because we all go backwards a little bit on it, but it was like, I I thought, I thought as far as coaches go, I mean,
18:10
You were pretty pinnacle. mean, you had your shit straight and weren’t afraid to stand on top of the soapbox and really feel it and really tell people the way that they needed to do it. And I respected that because I knew I was in the trench by myself and you basically gave me a hand up and I wasn’t about to crap all over that, but I knew that I needed to.
18:39
try it for my own, my own personal needs. I needed to try it and see what it did. And then that was a little apprehensive, but, um, I I’m really glad that I did it. And I’m really glad for the people pleasing part of me that I said, I need to try this. Well, and I know I’ve told you this and that’s why you’re here today, but like that experience.
19:08
For me, I wasn’t the one holding the gin and tonic. would be another year to reintroduce it myself. But your experience, you allowing me to hold space, to walk with you, to be there, good and bad, if this goes well, but it did go well. And that experience is actually what seeded the program that I have now where I focus on not sobriety, but
19:38
but emotional sobriety and then changing your behaviors with alcohol so that you can drink for pleasure instead of drinking for a bunch of problems. But you were the first one where I saw that everything I thought and that I had come to believe about recovery was not true. Like, oh, this is a do it yourself. This is a cup, know, choose your own ending sort of things.
20:06
where I was allowed, you, you allowed me to see that there’s not one right way and that you can recover and it doesn’t require abstinence forever. So talk to me then about what came next. So you have the gin and tonic. what, what came next? What came next was, Oh, what came next was just life. You know, it, I wasn’t tied to alcohol and
20:35
And really I didn’t need to drink. I could go somewhere and depending on whether I wanted to or not, which was a foregone conclusion to me because I had been a social drinker pretty much my whole life. But it was a play by your own rules deal. It wasn’t, I I remember years ago or even like my whole life is planning your whole life around what you’re gonna drink, you know, or.
21:04
or how you were
21:07
going to be stocked up and the beer fridge in my conference room was completely, you know, or how are we going to get alcohol into every aspect of our life, whether it be into our coffee, into our after, you know, our cocktails or whatever. was just, it was like in the passenger seat, so to speak, or the sidecar, the motorcycle, you know, it was like hanging on with you everywhere.
21:35
But after that, was just like, oh, life doesn’t have to evolve around that. That’s super cool. And it’s a whole lot lighter. So yeah, my friendships not necessarily had changed. I just changed how I approached them and what they included for me. I remember my first thinking going into like,
22:03
mocktails or what was I going to drink when I was still, you know, in that 10 months. And that was a really huge deal for me because everyone I knew drank. But after that first drink, was like, yeah, I could care less. I’ll order a Shirley Temple if I want to. And I did a couple of times. But it was so freeing. you drink in a Shirley Temple.
22:30
I love maraschino cherries, so I can drink a Shirley Temple all day long. it’s not, I can do what I want. And alcohol didn’t give a shit. Gin and tonic did not care. It wasn’t over there going, hopein’ this is what you need to do. When you realize that alcohol has zero power, and unless you’re gonna give it to it, it’s...
22:59
Amazing. So let’s get real. mean, have you had any episodes? I’m assuming you have. I’m hoping we have something to talk about. You’re right. Episodes of over drinking and how did how you respond to that change? In recent, recent days, recent weeks, I had a blow come to me.
23:28
My brother passed away and his friends, our friends, everyone in our community put together a truck parade because he drove over the road. And that was rough, but it was the night before.
23:51
That was the roughest. It was the anticipation and how am going to handle myself? How am I going to do this in public? Because it was literally 57 trucks of actual trucks and then all kinds of like other trucks, pickups and tow trucks and all of that kind of stuff. But the actual rigs, were 57 of them. At the funeral.
24:18
Not even we didn’t, he was cremated. So it was, it was a rally. called it and they drove through the town, like started at my old business. you know, we added this baggage in, um, started and went, God, it was probably like seven miles all the way through town. People were lined up on the streets and it was crazy. But the night before I remember thinking,
24:46
I had anxiety over it, I had.
24:52
so many emotions running through my head. And of course, you know, I had a four pack of hard cider because I was in New York and you know, some of the great best ones are made up there that I can only get there. So I had a four pack in the fridge and I ended up drinking all four and they’re 16 ounces. So it was fun. And I was on the phone with a couple of my brother’s friends, trucker friends, and we were talking and the next day.
25:22
I know that Dan’s girlfriend said to me, she’s like, do you even remember telling me that? And I’m like, oh yeah, I do. I do now, but you know, there wasn’t any.
25:38
any shame for me in it. I knew I was, I knew I was in a safe space. I knew what I was doing and it was what it was. I wasn’t sick. I didn’t get sick. I was in control. I was at my parents’ and I had a good time. You know, it wasn’t
26:07
It wasn’t negative. I didn’t drink to get rid of my feelings or cover my emotions. It was honestly a really cool thing that alcohol worked with me and I cried probably for one of the first times after he passed and I felt my emotions and...
26:29
And it just was what it was. I love that you said that alcohol kind of worked with you because to me, that’s the sign that you’ve taken all the shame out. Like alcohol is neutral. It’s a drug. does. It is. And while, you know, drinking a four pack, you know, it just is what it is. Like, yeah, it’s not good or bad or right or wrong. And there’s always a silver lining or you wouldn’t do it. And it sounds like
26:57
for you, it helps you access some of the emotions that were kind of getting stuck. You ended up enjoying your evening. You didn’t have any shame about it. didn’t make bad decisions. You were in a good space. And so you didn’t wake up the next day and think, oh, I made a mistake and I’m a failure and I’m going backwards.
27:19
myself the hangover whisperer now because it’s like, you can’t undrink the drinks, ladies. What you have to do is like learn how to sit with yourself and be okay with where you’re at and what you’re going through. And then also learn how to extract the lesson, extract the meaning. Like even here, I’m hearing good things, you know, the alcohol kind of served you in that moment. It really did. You know, for you, there’s a song where I’m sure it’s a country song where alcohol
27:49
made this or did this. can’t even remember. think it’s Brad Paisley, but he, was basically like a thank you to alcohol because you taught me how to dance and, you know, did all these things. And, know, it really can be freeing if used in the right way. And, and if our approach to alcohol is like an adult approach, so to speak, you know, where we know all the, and I, I feel like you
28:18
Maybe I’m wrong, but I feel like you can’t get there unless you’ve been down, you know, 10 miles bad road with it. You can’t just go to a frat party and be like, I picture Sheldon Cooper and his, you know, his wit-isms. Of course, he couldn’t handle his alcohol either, but I feel like that’s just not how it works. You have to go 10 miles a bad road with alcohol to walk.
28:47
out and you know, hand in hand with it and be in a good place with it. So four plus years later after we met, you no longer identify as somebody who struggles or worries about drinking. Not really, no.
29:10
No. And I can’t believe that I can say that. I I, like you, was always under the impression that if you had a problem with alcohol, you were donezo. There was no way back. You were doing the whole 10, 12 step process and saying your prayers and getting a chip. that was the way it rolled. Yeah. It’s like you, that’s why I think so many people resist.
29:38
getting sober, rightly so, because it’s like you have to agree that your party is over. You’re never going to get to do that again. Like you can’t handle it. You got the tap. You out. Yeah. And, and that’s a, it’s like cigarettes. Anybody who’s smoked and quit will tell you that was my best friend. started smoking when was 14 years old. How the hell am going to give that up? It’s the same deal with alcohol. I remember like thinking before, you know, the rock concert and I don’t know if you
30:08
if you can call Billy Joel rock, but whatever. Um, before that, had thought about it several times that I had a problem, but I was making it work. And what the hell am I going to reach for in these times of issue? And I probably didn’t think about it consciously, but what am going to do without my alcohol? mean, yeah, that’d just be a weird existence. So what
30:37
has changed about the version of you that was sick at the rock slash Billy Joel, maybe that’s a rock concert. What changed? What do you do?
30:53
Well, I open up my toolbox and I had a coach tell me and I can’t honestly remember which one it was or you’re just filling your toolbox with all these tools, whether it be meditations, whether it be EFT, whether it be, you know, any of the things and I’ve racked them up. mean, I’ve got
31:22
tools for days. I’ve got one of those big like snap-on toolboxes full of tools and I can use them. And sometimes you don’t think about it and a friend will go, because Lord knows that once we hit this point, we’ve got a whole bunch of friends that are in the same boat as us and we’ve all hit like midlife or whatever this is. And we all kind of go, yeah, we’re all going through this at the same time.
31:51
but you just reach for a different tool. And those tools don’t have Bud Light written on the box or whatever. Pick your poison. Yeah. Alcohol is not getting the job done anymore. When it’s your only tool, it turns toxic. True story. What advice would you give somebody who’s listening who may or may not be about to walk into that rock bottom moment?
32:21
And maybe they’re not there. Maybe they are just not happy. Maybe they’re just realizing that this is not sustainable and that something needs to change. What advice would you give?
32:34
Well...
32:39
Find a great program. Find a coach that you can work with. I’ve been through therapy, I’ve been through group, I’ve been through... Find what works for you. Talk to people. Because everybody has had issues, even though their Instagram pages don’t look like it. Talk to people you trust. Somebody that you know.
33:07
that you think is more mature than you.
33:13
Somebody somebody’s always going through something Don’t be afraid to be vulnerable and open yourself up. I know that’s what happened with Jess and I She was like lady what because I I was open when I got to a certain point I put it all over my social media, you know, I came Back from somewhere. I didn’t know if I was gonna come back from
33:41
And I fought really hard to come back from. So, and I felt like I had a reason to put it out there. Everything I’ve gone through in my life feels like it should be out there to help someone else. Or why the heck did I go through it? But yeah, find an advocate, find your best friend, listen to someone, do what you need to do, but don’t give up. And sure as hell don’t.
34:10
stay on the same path if it’s not working. Yeah. Yeah. There’s a lot of, there’s a lot of options, but what I’m hearing you say is it’s connection. It’s finding somebody to connect with. You got to get out of your own damn head. You do. You cannot think your way out of your own stupid thinking problem. You can’t as much as I’ve tried. You really can’t. have a
34:35
whole bunch of friends that have the same same issue overthinking does not lead to anywhere good. Yeah. So just kind of lean in to opposite action. You know, what do you want to do? Nothing for a drink. Pretend it’s going to go away. What’s the opposite of that? What does that look like? And it’s different for everybody. And you know, I, I firmly believe that I manifested your ad. mean, you were in, you know, and I’m
35:03
not even going to pretend I know about algorithms on Facebook, you were in Indiana, I was in Western New York. What are the chances that your ad was going to reach me on a normal, everyday basis? It wasn’t. I mean, it could’ve, it couldn’t’ve. I don’t pretend to know, but it seems like my thoughts about getting it right and checking into AA meetings that held no
35:34
happiness for me. I looked them up. I tried to go to a couple, but it just wasn’t it. And then bam, all of a sudden this shows up on my Facebook feed and I’m like, yeah, well, that sounds like exactly what I need. It was kind of a sliding door moment. Right. You had a moment of clarity, then the option appeared and you were like, yeah, she seems crazy, but kind of my brand of crazy. So let’s do this. Yeah.
36:04
I am all in with the hell of my guy. And I think I remember saying that what the hell have I got to lose? Yeah. Yeah. I do remember your first year discovery call because it wasn’t on like, couldn’t see your face. I didn’t have like a visual. You are for a while because I think you came to meetings and didn’t turn your camera on, which was fine. But it, it was, you were in your car or something. was, was sitting by the Creek. I I had left work and I
36:34
wasn’t gonna be able to make it home. So I just parked at this like little fishing like DEC fishing hole and sat there and had this call and thank God there were no fishermen there that day. I mean not that they would have been paying attention to me but yeah that was that was a rough deal and that was like I didn’t know you from Adam and I just laid it all out because at that point
37:02
I’d already hit rock bottom and there was nowhere to go but up. Yeah. But you also did the work. I mean, we’ve known each other now four years and hours and hours and hours of coaching and just being friends. So I value you so much and I just hope you know, and I want everybody that’s still listening to this to know that you were a major turning point where I realized this isn’t about the outcome.
37:32
Welcome to the, it’s not about the alcohol podcast. I realized like, oh my God, this is about your relationship with yourself. This is about how you’re seeing yourself. This is about how you’re coping with your stress. Like it’s so much bigger. And also it doesn’t have to be, you know, nothing that you decide on any given day. I’m never drinking again. Like, well, wait till tomorrow because yesterday’s truth is tomorrow’s bullshit. And I think we try to give ourselves solace in this story.
38:01
by making decisions for our future self about how much she will or won’t drink. And the solution is why don’t you trust her? Why don’t you trust yourself to know what’s working and what’s not and to pivot when you need to. Like that’s it. It really is. I think as women and we’ve gone down the whole patriarchy route and all of it.
38:28
But as women, we’re conditioned to do things a certain way. And you hear stories of these women who wake up one day, whether they’re 30, 40, 50, 60 years old, and go, hell no. And I think some people call it, my son calls it a midlife crisis. But I’m like, well, hell, I’m not in midlife. But it’s a turning point where you just say enough.
38:57
This is how I want to live. This is how I want to write my story. And you, we realized that the pen has been in our hand the whole time. Yeah. Ah, yeah, that’s a hard one. Yeah. Yeah. And we just get all caught up thinking there’s a right way to drink or to not drink. And it’s like, there’s no right way. There’s just the way and how it works. And it sounds like on the eve of your brother’s, you know, passing, like it was a, it was a good choice. So was a comfortable choice.
39:27
And it was a repeatable choice. Like you’d sign your hall pass for that. Oh yeah. All day long. not the choice. and learning how to take your brain off, goddamn autopilot and stop trying to follow other people’s rules and start following your intuition. Like that’s freedom. Yeah. You know, it works for you and you get to a point where you’re comfortable with what works for you. And that’s really all you need. Yeah. Yeah.
39:56
Well, thank you, my friend. I so appreciate you taking the time and sharing your story. I love you so much. I love you too. And thank you for having me finally. I finally got out of my own way enough to do this and had the opportunity to do it. It’s fantastic. Thank you. Thank you for the first hand up. Thank you for all of the time you spent and all of the meetings we went through and the sidebars and the craziness.
40:26
getting my life back. Love you too. All right. That’s it for today’s episode. Thank you so much for listening. And if you have heard Michelle’s story and you’re wishing that you could feel free around alcohol and maybe you’ve tried sobriety programs and followed other people’s rules, maybe you’ve even had months of sobriety under your belt and feel like you’re ready to move back into
40:52
a relationship with yourself that it doesn’t matter if you do or don’t drink. But you’re scared because in the past, when you have had a drink, you’ve slipped back into old habits. You feel like you’ve had a relapse or you end up back at square one, wherever the hell that is. I want you to know that there is another way. The truth is you don’t have to white knuckle this forever. You don’t have to avoid situations or people. You don’t have to avoid alcohol.
41:21
You don’t have to prove to yourself or anybody else that you actually have changed. What Michelle experienced is exactly what is available to you as well. That’s what we do inside my coaching program, The Next Chapter, where you learn how to rebuild trust with yourself, not to be perfect, but to be present, to stay aware, so that you can learn from what you like and what you don’t like. You can learn from mistakes that you make. And that means
41:51
You don’t ever have to start over again. You don’t have to hold yourself to some high watermark on the moral scoreboard. You don’t have to fear messing up. So if you’re ready to create that kind of peace with yourself and with alcohol, I want to invite you to schedule a free discovery call with either me or my team. We will talk about where you are now and where you want to be and the skills that you need to bridge that gap. And don’t worry.
42:20
This is not a high pressure sales call. This is truly a coaching call that can also double as a two-way interview to see if you’re a good fit for our program and if our program can meet your needs. And whether or not you decide to join, having somebody hold a neutral space for you to just listen so that you can hear yourself think and connect to clarity as to what you really need and want.
42:50
And as I know the shame and the guilt and the fear and the anxiety that comes with feeling like you have a drinking problem, I promise you that it is a game changer to just talk to somebody, to allow yourself to be seen in a non-judgmental, open-minded, curious space. When you allow someone else to see you like that, then you’re able to see yourself like that.
43:16
So if you’re interested in scheduling a discovery call, get in the show notes. There’s a link. There’s a short application. Just book the call. Take an action right now that moves you forward. Again, you don’t have to decide if you’re going to join the program. You don’t have to know if you’re ready for coaching. You just have to get on the schedule and then attend the call. And whether or not it’s a turning point, light bulb, life-shifting moment for you or whether it’s just a nice conversation,
43:46
you’ll know that you took action and that will give your brain evidence to believe that you are moving forward, that you do show up, that you are capable of change. And that confidence begets more confidence, my friends. So thank you for listening. Thank you for being part of my community. If this episode resonated and you wanna share it with somebody, you know how to do it. Copy and paste the episode or share the show on your socials.
44:14
I appreciate all of you who are helping this show grow organically. And whether you share it or not, I appreciate you listening. So I will see you on the next episode. And until then, have a kick-ass week.